Topic #15: Comfort Zones

Please click here to view a five minute speech I gave at the end of the Women's March in Santa Barbara, addressing the need for white people to step outside our comfort zones and become anti-racists instead of just non-racists. Enjoy!

Topic #14: Will You Continue to March Without the Crowd?

One of my favorite topics of research is the mere exposure effect, which suggests that the more we are exposed to someone, the more we like them. We watched this phenomenon unfold throughout the election as the most outspoken candidate consumed a disproportionate amount of airtime, social media presence and space in our conversations. Per this effect, not only did this exposure increase likability by his followers but it also increased the tolerance level of undecided voters. Everyone just got used to it, to such a degree that certain behaviors conservatives called "treasonous" just a few years ago now elicited a complacent eye roll and shoulder shrug.

You don’t have to be a genius to understand the intuitive concept of the mere exposure effect, but you do have to give it some thought in order to counterbalance its negative effects. When we perceive that someone is getting too much attention we tend to respond by complaining about it, thereby giving him even more. However, the best way to counterbalance the effects of mere exposure is to redirect the focus on something else. That’s what you did by joining the Women’s March last weekend, right?

Across the nation and even the world we witnessed people of all ages, sizes, abilities and backgrounds re-appropriating former female insults like the total badasses we are. I saw an elderly white lady carrying a sign that said “My Pussy Grabs Back” and a white mother with toddlers in tow rocking her sign “Bitches Get Shit Done.” I saw countless women shouting it loud and proud: “I'm a nasty woman who gets shit done and whose pussy grabs back.” Good job, ladies!

Since the mission of the Women’s March was all inclusive, we also saw more general signs expressing sentiments such as Human Rights and Love Fights Back. When the chants started we all enthusiastically shouted together, “A People! United! Will Never Be Divided!”

And yet.

While marching in my relatively homogenous hometown I noticed that a particular chant took longer to catch on in the crowd and then died off more quickly. Can you guess which one it was?

Black. Lives. Matter.

You also may have noticed that very few white people have been uttering (let alone shouting) “Black Lives Matter” since the movement was founded by Patrisse Cullors, Opal Tometi and Alicia Garza back in 2013. My question to you is this: Why not?

Communities of color would really like to know.

White feminism has been the target of criticism by black and brown communities from the get go, and rightly so. If you were marching in a larger city like L.A. or D.C. you may have noticed our black and brown brothers and sisters trying to call attention to the irony with signs like these:

(“I’ll see you nice white ladies at the next #blacklivesmatter march, right?”
Read more about this poster here.)

(“Put avocado on racism so white people notice.”
Read more about this sign here.)

Ouch.

White people, I applaud you for marching. I applaud the fight in you. Now that you’re paying attention, I am directly, explicitly and without hesitation asking you to stop being a hypocrite.

What I want to know is, will you march when you are alone, when there is no crowd? It was so easy for us to rally last weekend amongst like minded allies. Power in numbers made us even more convicted in our beliefs, in our mission. But outside of the contagion of the march will you easily say in regular daily conversations: “I stand against anti-Arab American racism and Islamophobia?” Will you stick a sign on your car that says: “Immigrants are Welcome Here?” Will the next phone case you purchase have a Gay Pride rainbow on it? Will you sport a Black Lives Matter T-shirt every Friday?

I know this is going to sting... but I’m just going to say it: Our marginalized brothers and sisters don’t want your damn safety pins. They want you to march alone, when it matters, and when it’s hard.

I’m not blaming you, so please check your white fragility at the door. Quite the opposite: I see in us, white friends, an enormous passion and dedication for social change. I see that this election has woken us from a blissful slumber and we want to do more. We are armed and dangerous now, but we don’t always know exactly what to do, and in these situations we often blow it. Let’s not blow it this time. OKAY?

As you may know, February is Black History Month. In addition to learning about important history let’s also make it our mission in February to learn more about the fight that’s going on right now at a time when we can actually do something. I know you are all fired up to do more, so here you go:

1. Read the entire Black Lives Matter Webpage to familiarize yourself with their mission. This will take 20 minutes or less.

2. Get ready to participate in Wear Out the Silence by purchasing a Black Lives Matter t-shirt. “Wear Out the Silence is a campaign asking white people to wear Black Lives Matter t-shirts every Friday as a way for us to bring the racial justice conversation deeper into our daily lives.” Important: Only buy BLM gear from black owned businesses (Ask if it’s black owned before you buy or use this short list of black owned online shops). This will take 10 minutes or less.

I know what you’re thinking.“Can I really make social change by wearing a t-shirt?”

Back to the mere exposure effect. Like anything else, a movement needs exposure and not just on marching day. To really catch on the exposure should come from people who may not directly benefit from the movement; it needs endorsement from people its critics may not expect. Every time I wear one of my Black Lives Matter t-shirts a white person engages me in conversation about it. This is movement. Of course, this is not all you need to be doing. But you need to be doing this.

Our mission is clear: Break the taboo associated with shouting Black Lives Matter in white circles. Say it loud, say it proud, and normalize it within white communities. Make it such a regular part of the overall fight for social justice that white people who shout “My body, my choice!” and “Marriage equality!” will suddenly see that not adding “Black Lives Matter!” with equal fierceness is nothing short of… racist.

Important Warning: This is not a trend. I’m not asking you to make BLM gear in fashion and then quickly forget about it once another idea comes along. We need to make this movement part of our ethos, which requires that we know what we are talking about. Please read the entire BLM website, especially their About BLM page, and practice talking about these issues before you hit the streets in your gear.

I am certain that if you get educated on the Black Lives Matter mission you will unabashedly support it. I am also certain that once you support it, it will become contagious in our white communities and the movement will benefit from mere exposure.

I’m only asking you to do two things today that will take 30 minutes, far less time and energy than you dedicated to your march. I’m asking you to march alone today, without the crowd. Will you?

Topic #13: Organizing White People

Showing Up for Racial Justice, Santa Barbara, is a chapter of a national organization with over 150 chapters and affiliate groups committed to drawing white people into racial justice action as part of a multi-racial movement for racial justice.

You might be thinking, "Hmmm. White people organizing sounds a bit freaky." 

I understand your confusion, and you're not alone. The fact that you are concerned about white people organizing is a good thing. As the co-founder of the Santa Barbara SURJ chapter, this is the main concern I hear voiced by folks who I consider perfect candidates for our group. With the hope of calling you in to join the fight, I've tried to address some issues that may cause you to hesitate before diving in. Here they are:

Frequently Asked Questions About Showing Up for Racial Justice

1. Why do you need a group for “white people?” Doesn’t this approach contradict the whole point of racial “equality”?

We are not a "whites only" group by any means, and would never advocate such a group. SURJ has multiracial membership and everyone is welcome as members and at meetings. You may notice that most of our members are white or white-passing, because SURJ is meant to answer a direct call by communities of color for white people to organize their own racial communities to do two specific things:
1. Take responsibility for educating themselves and their own racial group about their own privilege and responsibility for/implication in systemic racism.
2. Work harder to directly support communities of color in their already-existing efforts to combat racism, racial injustice, and white supremacy.

These are our primary goals, but SURJ has an even more specific mission: We plan to move seven million white people in the next seven years to take action for racial justice. “Why seven million? Recent research shows that for a movement to succeed, it needs the active and sustained participation of 3.5% of the population. 3.5% of white people in the US is around 7 million.” (Silverman, 2015).

Research also indicates that reluctant people are far more likely to listen to and be persuaded by members of their own racial in-group. As white people ourselves, “calling white people in” to join the fight for racial justice is our duty and our strength. And it's not just our duty to people of color, it's our duty to the collective wellbeing of all members of our society, including our own race. We will all be better off when we abandon the fear-based scarcity model that has contributed to the oppression of people of color for centuries...but in order to change we must undo some seriously ingrained and often subconscious ways of thinking. SURJ tries to act as a catalyst for this change by organizing actions, hosting workshops, and sharing information directed at motivating white people specifically to better understand their own privilege and start acting for racial justice for a better world.

The call to action for white folks to organize their own people is not new: 

Malcom X (in The Autobiography of Malcolm X, 1964): “Where the really sincere white people have got to do their ‘proving’ of themselves is not among the black victims, but out on the battle lines of where America's racism really is—and that's in their own home communities; America's racism is among their own fellow whites. That's where sincere whites who really mean to accomplish something have got to work.”

Modern day racial justice activists continue to make this call to action:

Charlene Carruthers, national director of Black Youth Project 100 (from washingtonpost.com):
“White liberals and progressives have a responsibility to organize their communities for social justice using an explicitly ‘anti-black racism’ frame. There is no need to hide behind black or people of color organizations. Commit yourself to organizing poor and working class white folks. We are capable of organizing our communities.” 

SURJ members acknowledge that we do not know how to be perfect allies/accomplices/collaborators, and we never will because racism is an adaptable and shape-shifting disease. However, we cannot wait until we know how to do it perfectly. The time is now. SURJ National offers extensive support in the way of training and resources to help us be more effective and accountable allies/accomplices/collaborators for racial justice. We also write our own materials for our members, including White Allyship 101, which we ask potential members to read before participating in a SURJ meeting. We take our accountability to groups and organizations led by people of color very seriously and we always welcome feedback. We commit to making adjustments when we err, and we will always make every effort to do it “right,” which will be defined by the communities to which we are accountable, not by us. Some SURJ chapters choose to have a local Accountability Council and others seek direction from SURJ National. Since our chapter is in a small town where we already have relationships with the leaders of our partner organizations, we take direction and feedback from them directly without asking them to do the additional work of sitting on a council for us (see below for details).

2. It seems like a lot of this work is already being done by other groups both locally and nationally. Are you working with them?
Yes! Our mission, in part, is to work in support of already existing social and racial justice groups led by people of color, and to practice accountability to these partner orgs through frequent dialogue, direct collaboration on actions and events, and listening to feedback. Here is a partial list of organizations we have worked with or are currently working with: CAUSE, Black Lives Matter SB, The Movement for Black Lives, SBCC Black Student Union, ACLU, and Just Communities. We work to expand this list constantly. We also strive to develop relationships with progressive organizing groups that are majority white, in hopes of educating and persuading them about the importance of showing up for racial justice, specifically, in addition to the other causes they support.

3. Your group seems to be focused on (name any issue, cause or group) and I’m more concerned about (name any issue, cause or group). 
We really appreciate the concern that all people and groups suffering from racial injustice be supported by our work. When we focus more on one issue than another it is because a) current events require immediate attention to this issue, 2) we need to support what our partner groups are doing at the moment, or 3) we don’t have enough people in a workgroup dedicated to the specific issue. Rest assured that we hold each work group accountable for keeping us updated on how we can continually support each cause. Another important consideration is that working toward racial justice for any group is working for all groups. The issue that appeals to you most may not be connected to the group that is seeking our support at this moment, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t desperately needed in the fight. Here are the current workgroups you can join (we adapt these as necessary, and welcome new ideas): Showing Up for Muslims & Arab Americans Showing Up for Health Equity Showing Up for Environmental Justice Showing Up for Immigrant Rights Showing Up to Dismantle Racialized Policing Showing Up for Anti-Racism Education in Higher Ed. Showing Up for Racial Equity in K-12 Schools

4. How can I get involved? 

So glad you asked. Here is a list of things you can do RIGHT NOW to get up to speed with our work (if you join our group you will also receive a weekly email with other specific and time sensitive actions for each week):

GET INVOLVED WITH SURJ SB:

• Follow SURJ SB on Facebook, and come to our next monthly meeting posted on our page.
• Start taking responsibility for your own anti-racism education by viewing our Suggested Anti-Racism Resources

GET INVOLVED WITH SURJ NATIONAL

• Join SURJ National email list to receive regular information on justice work.
• Browse the SURJ National Website to get a better understanding of what we do.
• Consider starting a chapter if there isn't one where you live by using this toolkit

 I hope you'll consider joining us as one of the seven million.

Sincerely,

Carrie Hutchinson

SURJ SB Co-Founder

Topic #12: White Allyship 101: It’s a Process, Not an Identity

This post was updated and reposted here: http://notesfromawhiteally.blogspot.com/2017/08/topic-23-white-allyship-101-its-process.html

Topic #11: Field Trip

The National Museum of African American History and Culture in Washington, D.C. should be a required field trip for every American. Ironically, most people will not have the means or ability to see it. 

My unearned privilege allows me to take time off work without losing my job and to earn enough money to travel for pleasure, so I consider it my duty to report back to those who won't be able to make it to the museum in person. 

I hope this virtual field trip gives you a small taste of the experience. The footage here only captures about 1% of the content of the museum, and fails to invoke the emotion that the museum's curators expertly created with light, space, and sound. 

These are the photos I managed to take in the six hours I spent at the museum, with you in mind. 

Enjoy.

Topic #10: Thanksgiving: Breaking Bread and Breaking White Silence

It happens every year. I start to think about planning for the holidays in October, then I blink and suddenly Thanksgiving is on my doorstep. BAM! It's on. 

So here we are already. Today is Thanksgiving Day in the U.S. and you've got important things to do, like stick your hand up a poor turkey's backside and referee a potential family civil war over dinner, so I won't waste any time getting right to it. Here is...

The Official Showing Up for Racial Justice (SURJ) Guide to Surviving Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving Day Discussion Guide: Real conversations about race won't be easy, so you may need some help with talking points. SURJ has you covered with a discussion guide that will help you navigate tough conversations, as well as some questions you can ask to elicit feedback and avoid causing others to shut-down. Click here for the discussion guide!

Thanksgiving Day Hotline: If you followed the guide but you still find yourself in an unmanageable conversation, excuse yourself to the bathroom and simply text SOS (with no quotation marks!) to 82623, and they’ll send you more key talking points that tend to come up in these tough conversations. If you get really*stuck, they’ll even get on the phone with you for a short individual coaching call. It’s vital for white people to break white silence about the danger of Trump’s presidency -- and SURJ will make sure you have the tools you need to have those conversations.

But wait, there's more...

Thanksgiving Day History Lesson: Don't forget this one! You have a bigger job to do than just preventing a full-on blow out across the dinner table. Part of fighting white supremacy is acknowledging the true story of Thanksgiving to help break the perpetuation of White Totally Fictional (WTF) history (see image below). Now is the time to bring our young people into the fight for racial justice by educating them on the reality of the situation. Ask the little people at your house what they already know about Thanksgiving, and gently point them toward better information. There are many resources out there, including these:

What Really Happened on Thanksgiving?

The True Story of Thanksgiving

(image of white Pilgrims kindly sharing food with kneeling Native Americans)

It may be a huge relief when your relatives finally leave, but rest assured, the struggle is not over. Black Friday is tomorrow and this one is going to take all your strength:

Black Friday BLACKOUT: Please take (in)action with your dollars by participating in the BLACKOUT of Black Friday, and spread the word. THIS IS ONE IS SUPER IMPORTANT. #BlackOutBlackFriday is an economic boycott to demand an end to police brutality and racial injustice in the U.S. Read more here: https://blackoutfriday.org/

Please also share on social media with the following hashtag: #BlackoutBlackFriday

Here's wishing you an educational and peaceful (but not silent) holiday season ahead!

Topic #9: Six Principles for Fighting with Dignity

You know that sinking feeling that creeps in on the morning after a bad fight? It drops like a bomb right between sleep and consciousness when you finally awake and remember what happened the day before. As you rise to face the day, the incessant wheels of rumination begin.

This election cycle feels like an endless family fight where each morning we wake to face the aftermath of what happened the day prior. Our conflict is so ubiquitous that even staying away from the news won’t protect us. It’s not just on Facebook and Twitter where we consume the endless feed; the conflict leaks into everyday conversations, friendly gatherings and workplaces. We now spend our days ruminating about something we heard or read, determined for our own side of the argument to prevail. We go to sleep shaking our heads, then wake and repeat.

Our country has become like a dysfunctional divorcing family, incapable of managing our differences to the demise of both parties. We’ve screamed, we’ve gunny-sacked, we’ve overdramatized and embellished. Now, as the election cycle nears the end we find ourselves caught in a spiral of negativity that feels bound to implode.  America, we are long overdue for some family therapy, but we’re going to need a really good therapist if we want to come out of it alive.

Indeed, a conflict of this magnitude requires an exceptionally qualified mediator. What better doctor to invoke than the king of conflict resolution himself, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.? Few people in our history have more impeccable credentials for managing intractable conflict than Dr. King. If he were here today, what would the brilliant and honorable mediator prescribe for what seems to be an obstinate conflict of epic proportions between the schools of thought in this election? From his decades of experience with such conflict King crafted the Six Principles of Nonviolence, an approach we’d be smart to consider as a starting point for surviving November while maintaining our dignity, and then for moving forward more constructively.

Principle One: Nonviolence is a way of life for courageous people.

Dr. King would want us to know that the high road is always the hardest road. It takes enormous courage not to sink to the level of our enemies. It’s easy to rage on Facebook and get 25 “likes.” It is time to do better, and better will likely feel harder. Important work is always hard work. 

Principle Two: Nonviolence seeks to win friendship and understanding.

The good doctor believed that together we could be stronger. He imagined that we could be a Beloved Community if we just understood that to wish ill for our neighbor only brings illness to ourselves. We are interconnected, and by spitting poison at one another we only poison our shared drinking well. You may counter argue by saying “Well they’re doing it!” 
Pause. Ask yourself, "Is this who I really am?" Then ask yourself, "Will this be effective?"

Principle Three: Nonviolence seeks to defeat injustice not people.

Dr. King would want us to consider reframing the problem. A nonviolent approach treats our enemies as equal victims in our current system, but not necessarily evil people. Each of us was raised in a unique context that led us to the beliefs we have now, and we each feel legitimately justified in our perspective. As explained by psychologist Neil Kressel, “It is important to remember that virtually all perpetrators of great evil in the world believed that they were victims of some longstanding prior outrage that justified their militancy” (2002). 

Principle Four: Nonviolence holds that suffering can educate and transform.

Dr. King would ask us to try and see the good in our struggle. If we can be transformed by our new understanding, we can exceed possibilities that didn’t exist for us before. We can come out of this better than we were.

Principle Five: Nonviolence chooses love instead of hate.

Okay, this one isn’t easy, but Dr. King would ask us to try and respond to hate with love. Just try it on for one day. Okay, an hour. See if you feel any different.

Principle Six: Nonviolence believes that the universe is on the side of justice.

A nonviolent resistor has faith that justice and truth will prevail. We do not give up the struggle for justice, but we become less attached to it when we recognize ourselves as change agents in a larger plan that we cannot accelerate through interpersonal or intergroup attacks.

You may be concerned that applying the Six Principles could potentially turn you into a human doormat. How can we make social change with so much love and such little fight? According to Dr. King the Six Principles don’t necessarily preclude direct action against injustice, which he outlined in his Steps of Nonviolent Social Change. We can fight the good fight and still do it honorably.

King exercised this ambitious code of behavior while imprisoned by his oppressors, having suffered decades of extreme violence and murder against his own people. If one man could practice such grace in his approach to his assailants and at the same time be incredibly effective in the fight for social change, then surely we can at least give it a try.

Even a less experienced mediator than Dr. King would tell you that if something isn’t working you should try a new approach. I want to feel better when I wake up in the morning. What do you say, America, won’t you join me?